September 19.It was Clara birthday today.Happy Birthday!It was also the mysterious G-Dragon's Ex's birthday,Miss J?Wonder if she regretted or not?

I've been freaking busy this few days.Studying till late at night.Sleeping at 1 plus and waking up at 5 plus.Studying non-stop.Paying attention in class just to do well.I cant believe myself but yes,thats what Im doing right now.Busy memorising Bio facts,Chem equations,A maths formula.

I wonder what will it be like next year?I cant wait for exams to finish.My eye bags are getting bigger and thicker day by day.Van said I look thinner today.Must be because of nights of little sleep that caused it.I have never been so hardworking before.I want to do well.I have to do well.

Its not really a choice.

Ok...MEP performing is on Monday and Yim has not combined with me at least once.Pretty Screwed isnt it?I just cant wait for exams to end and I will definitely fulfil my dream.Which is to sleep the whole day.Sleep late on Friday and wake up late in the afternoon on Saturday.Eat,then to sleep again till night for dinner then sleep again.Yeah man.

I went out with Van in the afternoon.We had PastaMania.We were talking about A Maths and how hardworking we've got.No choice.This is the type of educational system we live in.No point arguing,its useless,Just face the fact and accept it.We walked around shops and bought a Minnie Notebook together for Bio.We ended revising Bio in KFC where 2 bengs kept starring at us.They must be thinking us as freaks or nerds?Haha...I've finally become one.

Troubles increase as you grow older.What can you do?Pretty much nothing.Face it?Im so irritated by everything now.Its 330 in the morning and Im still awake doing nothing.So gonna wake up late 2morrow before studying.I hope I get good results.Please let me pass everything.I dont wanna disappoint my family and most of all,I dont want to waste my hardwork.Im giving in my best until 6 Oct.I have to prove to myself that I can.

I've finally realise how important study is.I failed 4 subjects in overall and its pretty hard for me to pass the overall for the whole year.I may retain if I dont do well this time.Retain?It never occurred to me.I've always thought that my results were bad but im never the retain kind of student.Finally, I've woken up.I can never retain but by looking at my results,its seem so.Even if I dont retain,School will make me drop to combine Science or drop my A Maths.Either one is equivalent to let me not go to JC.My L1R5 is 31.Its 31.31-4 = 27.I cant even go to a Poly.JC?Too far away.

I've started my intensive revision already.I have to pass my E Maths and Bio for sure.I have to pass.If not,Im retaining for sure.Ok,In order to pass my overall for Bio, I have to get 61 /100 for this test. I've never passed Bio at all.How am I suppose to pass with a B4 this time?Even if I just passed it,They will definitely force to drop to combine Science. I cant pass A Maths for sure.I cant pass Chem too.All Im depending on is to pass my E Maths and Bio overall.I have to.Its not a choice.And I have to do very well for all my other subjects.

I cant afford to drop or worst still,retain.I cant.All I can do now is to study hard for my maths and sciences.I have to pass my overall.I have to do well for English.I can only afford to fail 2 . No matter what,Im giving my best shot.I have to fight all the way till 6 Oct.Only by giving my best shot,then I will have no regrets.Or else,I may regret forever.


I never felt so strong about study before.Probably I have not woke up.But after receiving my report slip for term 3.It was like a tight slap on my face.Im not going anywhere with this kind of results.My final goal is to get into VJC. Or else other school is nothing to me.I know the cut off point for VJC.I have to be a 6-pointer.Vivien?A 6-pointer?Its never linked.But for once,I realise how important study is to my future.I dont wanna lose out.

Remember?Only money can give me the sense of security.Study till 6 Oct and I'll relax.I know Im a fighter.I know I can do it.

After watching the recent episode of Korean Reality Show,'We Got Married',My urge of getting married increased again.This show is crazily testing my patience.ITS SO SWEET!<3! Alex and Shinae are the prince-and-princess couple.Crown J and So In Young are the New Product-Ant Couple.Andy and Solbi are the realistic ANSOL couple.And last but not least,its Hwang Bo and Hyun Joong with their noona-dongseng couple!

The couples live together in a mock house and the PD nims will throw them scenarios and they have to act like real married couple.And sometimes of the show,Although I know that they are not real married couples but sometimes,it gets confused.I would really think that In Young and her Seobang make a good match.

I wanna get married too~Its too sweet.Its insanely sweet~

I've always imagined my marriage days.But recently,I had a nightmare,I really hope its just a nightmare and not a fall shadow.I dreamt that my mum and I passed by this fortuneteller who pops up and said my mum's life story and my mum was so shocked as everything was right and the fortuneteller turned to me and grabbed my hand,wrist I should say.And starting visualizing my whole life?He looked at the paths of the lines on my palm and shaked his head.He said I was gonna have a nice boyfriend and the guy looks decent,decent looking,decent job,decent family background,decent smile,decent husband-to-be.However,I AM gonna marry that head-to-toe-decent guy but once we're in a marriage,Everything is gonna change.He's not as decent anymore.He slaps me...He shouts,all things changed out of a sudden.And I pictured that. And the fortuneteller added on by saying that I will get one divorce in my life.

Hell no.Im not getting a divorce man.If its others,I will encourage them if They are not happy in their marriage but for me?HELL NO!But im fine with others having a divorce but im not fine about having a divorce myself.I feel embarrassed though...Im really afraid...

But I always think about marrying a GREAT guy who can afford a bungalow like Alex ( WGM ). And he's in cooking cause I SUCK at it.In the morning,we'll wake up from our elegantly decorated bedroom. During the holidays where we dont have to work,we'll wash the car together,spraying water at each other.Or prepare cookies together and eat it all up in the afternoon with a glass of milk.Both of us just sits there listening to songs and humming to it while sweet-talking.

And I always pictured that we'll have a high-tea table by the window and when it rains,we'll sit by there,drinking our warm tea,taking photos of each other and kicking each other legs underneath the table.Gazing into each others eyes,daydreaming.Acting cute to each other and smiling at each other.And when the rain stops,we'll put up the laundry together.Hanging our clothes,blanket,underwear.Joking around in the meantime.

I'll try begging him to do the rest of it while I go in and make him something to eat.Encouraging him after helping me out with the chore works.Then we'll rest awhile on the bed before going out for dinner.He'll rest and I'll read books.Jazz music being played.And we'll get changed and set off to eat out.Im fine in going anywhere to eat.

We'll play the latest songs on the car.And when our favourite love song is played,we'll give a hint look at each other.Smiling.I'll look at my wedding ring,remember the day we got married.The day where women are the most beautiful.The day I wore my white bridal gown and exchanged vows with him.And while the car stops for red light,I will jokingly try to reach for the car gear or try to switch on some car functions.And he will gently push my hand away and warn me , "People are gonna be in danger if you drive." And I will smack his arm.

And if we meet his friend(s) on the way,He'll introduce me as,"my wife."And I'll give my very best to put up a good image infront of his friend to make him look good.And after the dinner when we go home,we'll take a great bath and change into our couple pajamas.We'll look at stars together until we're sleepy and go to bed.That would be really sweet isnt it?

But yeah I know...Often marriage is so much different from dating.We'll have to face many things in marriage.Reality is one of them.Not all marriage is sweet and perfect.But yeah...I always try to think of things like that.How nice if I could get married right now.Wonder when we'll be that big day?And I really hope the guy is good.I dont wanna have economic problem by then...Ah...
Autumn night,thinking about marriage.Oh the marriage life.